Baring it all (well... almost) - The Mirror Can Tell Lies

Originally, I wasn't sure that I was going to write a blog. I was just thinking of tracking my progress in journals and such on Facebook. When I started thinking more and more about it, the more nervous I got.

All of my friends would see my "before" pictures. Me in my little red bikini that I bought four years ago. Me in my skinny blue jeans that do not make me look so skinny anymore due to the muffin top bubbling over the edge.

Then I decided that I would just start a blog. And come to think of it, I post the link from each blog post to my profile on Facebook as well as a Facebook group that I am a member of, so my friends are going to see my before pictures anyway.

And I know I'm not that big, but over the years I have accumulated cottage cheese on the back of my thighs (and I hate to say it, but on my ass as well.), my buns are losing the former "Hey, look at that chicks butt" look to them and I've developed slight back rolls. Which, when I went and looked at my self timed photo, I think my jaw dropped. I don't even know WHEN I started to get those little rolls. Why did no one tell me? Maybe, because I don't gallivant around town naked... *laughs* who knows? Maybe it's just an awkward subject to bring up.

And surprisingly, you do not see these things in the mirror after you get out of the shower. Let's all admit it, we put a show on for ourselves in that mirror. We suck in that junk food belly, we turn so that we are on like, a 45 degree angle and raise one leg just so slightly to view our sweet meats, and MAGIC! They are so nice and round! You do not... I repeat, do not see the shapeless thing you see in the picture above. The mirror can tell lies, let's just hope you didn't ask who the fairest one of all is when it lies.

I've really been keeping up my motivation! Tomorrow is the day that I'm scheduled to intensify my workouts, and I've ordered the "Insanity" workout DVDs, and I'm really looking forward to starting it with one of my girlfriends. She does live in the next town over, but we are starting at the same time and we are going to keep each other on track for the whole 60 days!

We also have a lot of support in our community for health, but that's another blog post!

What have you been doing to create your own happiness as of late? Have you been doing anything interesting that you are excited about?

Photo Friday! A Collection of Pics From This Week

Welcome to Photo Friday! Every Friday I will post my favourite pictures from that week, whether it's from one of my daily walks, future hikes, water adventures and more. I will also include random news from my week.


How I did with my food choices at the "Viva Volunteers" Volunteer Appreciation Dinner yesterday night: I actually did very well. I filled my plate with mostly salad and vegetables. I did have dessert, but I shared with my good friend Caroline :) We split a small piece of cheese cake and a small piece of some sort of... I'm going to say chocolate hazelnut type cake. Either way, I am going to work out extra hard today.


What is my current weight? My current weight is 172.2. Still the same as it was the last time I weighed myself, which is really frustrating because I feel like I have been working really hard the past week/week and a half. Although, I have been hitting the weights (Do you have the bullets for my guns? Because I'M LOADED!) I'm going to make a few changes to my workout schedule and hopefully it will change a little bit.




ANYHOO!
Here are my favourite pictures from this week. I hope you see a few that catch your eye and that you have an awesome weekend!




Initially, when I first saw this kid I thought he was digging around for beer he'd put in the water to keep it cool. Then I thought that he looked like a good kid and that can't be what was going on- but what on earth is he doing?...




...Why, he's catching a fish with his bare hands of course! Silly Robin!




Tulips in a strangers yard. Quick tasty morsel of info - when I was a teenager, I would go around the neighbourhoods surrounding my home and steal their flowers in the middle of the night... me now would kill me then.



I love how this one turned out with the colours of the Dandelions and the sky



A beautiful sunset



Trees on one of my regular walking/hiking trails




And my absolute FAVOURITE picture of the week! I have NEVER in my life, seen a butterfly quite like this! Part of it's wings are see through. I am SO pleased that this one focused on time and that it was being a good model for me :) Work it baby!


How was your week? What are some of your hobbies?

When Others Eat Garbage

I'm just going to put it out there - It is REALLY hard to try to lose weight and eat healthy when people in your life are bringing home things you can't eat. It's frustrating, annoying and, depending on how you look at it - inconsiderate.

In the past week or so I have had McDonalds breakfast, KFC (Popcorn Chicken and fries... *sad face*) chips, pop, Toblerones *sad face* and the like coming through my door filling my house with their mouthwatering goodness.

I hear a bag of chips open or the crinkle of the tin from a Toblerone and it sets my teeth on edge. And some people do not eat quietly my friend! Some foods cannot be eaten quietly.

And isn't it worse when we are in a bad mood to start out with? I was all set to go to my last painting class today, and when I pulled my car into the lot and put my car in park, I was SO not in the mood. It was a cross between sad, mad and just plain ol' grumpy. So, I decided to skip my class (We were just finishing the project from last class anyway, easy peasy.) and I drove to pick up some milk for the house (Although *I* am lactose intolerant, some other people aren't. On the way I stopped off at the pet store to look at the birds, bunnies and hamsters (Because other than fish, that's all they have for animals)

When I went to get the milk, I was feeling a little better, but still in testy waters. I grabbed the milk, a bottle of Lime Perrier for me and browsed the desserts. I know! Never fear though! I didn't get anything! I did look at a single serve Caramilk cake and it's calories. I figured that for 300-ish calories I could have a huge salad with tons of protein, with feta cheese and Klamata olives - and promptly put the tiny cake down.

I had SUCCEEDED in saying "no" to something that I really wanted, but really didn't need.

And I felt really good about that.

Still in a little bit of a funk, I came home and ate some lentel hummus with broccoli and baby carrots. Still flavourful and still good.

Later, I heard keys jingling and shoes being put on and "I'm going to the store to get munchies!" and the door closing.

 

Oh, great.

And the funk that I'd mostly shaken off was back. The Toblerone wrapper crinkling and chips being munched on.

I understand that not everyone wants to eat completely healthy, which is what I have been doing since May 1. I know that I won't be able to change everyones eating habits and that it will take A LOT more time to change mine for the long run.

What does it make it more irritating is the fact that when I sent a text saying "Please eat your breakfast at McDonald's" the front door opened a little while later and that brown paper bag came through the door while I was working out in the living room. Now whether the text was missed or ignored, I don't know - but I can't even tell you how that made me feel. And not a word was said afterwards, no apology saying "Oh, I just noticed this text... sorry." Granted, I didn't bring it up either. I was tired from my work out and annoyed and not in the mood to talk.

I will bring up this issue. I have to. For now I will just vent :) I feel a little a lot better.

ANXIETY - Eating Out And About

How about some reading music? I hope you like Cowboy Casanova!

One idea that has made me anxious since I have changed my eating habits in order to be healthier, is the idea of eating something that I haven't prepared myself and don't have control over.

 

I have a "Viva Volunteers" volunteer appreciation dinner coming up, as well as a certain important date coming up that I, under no circumstances want to cook for - never mind the fact that even in May, the weather is too hot for me to bear the thought of turning on my oven.

 

And I am not going to lie - I am a foodie. I will eat the yummy deep fried calamari, the cheesy bread and the cheese burger with fries with refillable pop. (Great combo hey?) Put me in a line up for a buffet, I will have a big plate FULL of all of the tasty, carb loaded, crunchy, sauce drenched finger licking morsels you can think of. I *will* put some veg on my plate to give myself the illusion that I have a nice rounded, albeit, piled high dinner.

 

Don't even bring up dessert. Usually, I get one of every kind of dessert that is on the dessert table. You know those delicious tiny squares with caramel and chocolate? I am ALL over that like flies on stench. I come away with another large plate brimming with sweet goodness - AND go back for seconds. And let me tell you, I can EAT.

 

You can see why I am getting nervous about these upcoming events. What is going to be my smart choice solution? Let's break it down.

1. Eat a good breakfast with plenty of protein. It's been documented that people who include protein in their breakfast (as well as in other meals) are fuller and can sustain themselves for longer than those who don't. I would also like to point out, if you are using your muscles lots, you NEED protein to help build and repair your muscles.
2. Drink plenty of water throughout the day. Sometimes thirst is mistaken as hunger, leading you to consuming more calories (pffffffth.....) than you actually need to.
3. If you are going to be eating somewhere unfamiliar, take a look at them menu before hand. Go in and get a paper copy or take a look online and decide before hand what you would like to eat and stick to it. By doing this you have less of a chance to get distracted by the foods you would rahter avoid.
4. Have a snack before you get to your destination so you don't go in starving and wind up eating the whole bread basket.
5. PORTION CONTROL! Nutritionists are always saying that restraurant portions are too big. Eat or order half of what you intend to order. As a society, North Americans are sadly accustomed to larger portions.Allow yourself a slight cheat. If you want dessert, have dessert.
6. Drink a big glass o' H2O before it arrives at your table (Or you walk up to the dessert table) If you're at a restaurant eat a small portion of your dessert or share. If you are at the dessert table limit yourself to 1-2 little delish dessert squares and fill the rest of your plate with fruit.

So how do I feel about eating out of the house when the time comes? I'm still a little nervous. I still have a long way to go until my new eating habits are just second nature. I won't be able to change my eating habits over night. I *AM* however, ver relieved and feel confident that I have a plan. Not to mention good family and friends that do, to some extent, keep me accountable and who want me to reach my goals. (A big thank you my loves!)

I think I'll do just fine... I'll keep you updated :)

Here's a picture of one of my recent meals :) Looks yummy for a salad hey?

Mesculin salad with yellow peppers, red onion, radish and turkey breast, with Lime flavoured Perrier, which FYI, tastes like the green Fruit Loops!

180 - Turning It Around

I'm pretty sure I nearly fell over. I looked away, then looked back down again. Yup, there it is - 180. The scale read 180 lbs.

Now, I've made an unofficial and small effort over the years to NOT care about what the scale said, (partially due to a history of anorexia) but rather, if I could look in the mirror and be happy - that was good enough for me. The Scale hitting 180 was the last straw for me.

Over the past few years my weight has slowly, but steadily crept upward. For a couple years I wavered around 155-160. No biggy. Then I moved and it wavered between 160, 165 and 170. No Problem right? I'm a tall gal.

Mid March was the down fall - and the creep upwards. I was having a miscarriage. (And don't believe what the preggo books say, you do NOT have to be in severe pain or bleeding severely when you have a miscarriage, just sayin') This was no ordinary miscarriage, this was the miscarriage that wanted to stay for as long as it could.

The oral tablets the doctors gave me to help my body clean house, did not work. We found this out two weeks after I took the supposed "easy" pills. March and April were a blur of doctors appointments, ultrasounds, ER staff, lots of emotional exhaustion and confusion. I ended up getting day surgery scheduled. I was to go in for a D&C to clear out what my body, and those pills, couldn't so far.

For a month and a half I chose McDonalds instead of homemade chicken, Miss Vickys Salt and Vinegar instead of salad and LOTS of chocolate instead of fruit. It helped give me a distraction and numb what I was feeling. Eventually, (a few weeks ago) I was ready to start eating healthy again, and take control. I played with the idea of getting a personal trainer. I decided that I should weigh myself before I took any futher steps.

Which leads me to here. With you reading this right now. I gained 15-20 lbs in the span of a month and a half to two months. HOW ON EARTH did this happen? More importantly, how long will it take me to lose it?

A woman possessed and determined to meet my goal, I started creating a plan. I (more or less) cut out junk food from my diet. I wrote a list of what my temptation foods were, what I could replace them with; made a commitment to walking every evening after dinner and getting in some physical activity in every day.

I went to the library to find a book unrelated to health/weight loss/dieting, but found a great book on just that topic by a Wall St nutritionist, (more on that later) bought an exercise bike and decided to set my goals in 10 lb increments.

I still have a little way to go to 170 (here's hoping for any day now!) and I am still finding the tools that work for me to keep my motivation up, but no one else can make this happen. It's all me. I AM going to make it work.

I choose my health over greasy food.
I choose to make my life better.
I choose me.