*Just a note, this was written RIGHT before I got on the plane with Little Miss to move back to our home province, and since then things have been crazy with trying to unpack with a baby. Sorry for the delay, but I *did* want to publish this, because I think the content is important.*
So, let me start off by saying, trips to the ER are
never fun. Especially when you have to head out at 3 in the morning.
Especially if you are making the trip for your child.
Let me also be very forthcoming and say, Little Miss and I usually co-sleep on the couch. I know, not exactly safe in terms of co-sleeping and many nurses and doctors would be giving me a lecture right now if they could and that they can't really support co-sleeping because it's not recommended by health Canada. Up until now, we haven't had any issues. Usually I wrap a large swaddling blanket around LM and then around me so there is no risk of falling (obviously didn't do that last night). I used to have her between myself and the cushions on the couch, but stopped at the advise of my midwife who as worried she might get overheated.
SO! Last night...
It was about 2:45ish when I woke up to a "THUD!" Like the sound of a poundcake falling to the ground - and then a wail from my very startled little girl. I scooped her up from the floor and cradled her in my arms. And surprisingly, she calmed down MUCH sooner than I thought she would. And she nodded off to sleep again. I grabbed the diaper bag, made sure that there were plenty of supplies in case we were at the hospital for a longer than desirable period of time, packed up Victoria in her car seat and we were off.
On the way, I sat in my seat and then my mind was going a mile a minute. "What if the nurses and doctor were mean to me?", "What if they had to keep her under observation for a ridiculously long time and we miss our flight for our move back home?", "What if they think I'm a bad mother?"
"What if they think I'm a bad mother and call Child Protective Services?"
On the drive I came the the resolution that I certainly am NOT a bad mother, no matter what anybody thought. I am only a mother who made a choice. A bad and unsafe choice, with an outcome that could have been prevented, but not a bad mother. I am a mother whose stomach turned in knots as I was rocking my baby to comfort her. I am a mother who decided right away that the right thing to do was take my daughter to the hospital. A mother who was praying that everything was okay.
Thankfully, the ER was empty and we were seen pretty much right away. The staff were surprisingly nice and didn't judge me. The doctor was so pleasant - even at 3:45 in the morning. She was kind, and thorough in checking LM out for an injuries, in her questions to see if any behaviors have changed and detailed in what we should look out for in case we though things were taking a turn for the worse at home. Good news, Victoria is great, the doctor couldn't find anything wrong with her. YAY! She said that she was just startled which is why she calmed down so quickly and usually babies stay limp when they fall. She once saw a kid in the ER who fell two stories and was perfectly fine - no scratches, bruises or broken bones.
I walked out those double sliding doors out to the car feeling better and holding my babe just a little closer and tighter.
SO! Needless to say, we won't be co-sleeping on the couch anymore. In the new house, we will have a bed that we can use for co-sleeping.
Do you co-sleep and want to do it safely?
- Make sure your baby is on their back. If you breastfeed while lying down and your baby is on her side, make sure you return her to her back after she’s finished eating.
- A lot of families find that the best position for baby is on the side of mom, not in the center, since mom is often more responsive in the middle of the night
- Control the temperature. You don't want your baby to overheat, turn down the heat. Dress yourself in a long-sleeve shirt and dress your baby in a night outfit in which she doesn’t need a blanket. That way you can keep the covers safely down, and your arms won’t get cold.
- Those who should not cosleep with an infant, however, include: other children, particularly toddlers, because they might not be aware of the baby's presence; parents who are under the influence of alcohol or any drug because that could diminish their awareness of the baby; parents who smoke because the risk of SIDS is greater.
- Make sure your mattress fits snugly in the bed frame so that your baby won't become trapped in between the frame and the mattress.
- Don't place a baby to sleep in an adult bed alone.
- Do not place a baby on a soft surface to sleep such as a soft mattress, sofa, or waterbed.
- Get a "Co-Sleeper". A bassinet that attaches to your bed. No worried of rolling over your baby; you get your space so you can stretch out and your baby gets the benefit of being near you.
- NEVER co-sleep if your baby was born premature or had a low birth weight
- Never co-sleep if you are extremely tired, or have a sleep disorder, such as sleep apnoea. You may be in such a deep sleep that you don't wake up if you roll onto your baby
