Gender Reveal! It's A...

Girl!

And her name is going to be Victoria. I am happy that I get to pass down a family name too. Alice (which will be Victorias middle name) is a family name that has been passed down from mother to daughter for four generations now. It was originally my great freat grandmothers first name, and since her, it's been passed down to daughters as a middle name. I'm glad that I'm able to pass down

Aside from names, amazing news right? Okay, I know it's 50/50 shot of being either (Or if you're a weirdo like some of my friends, 33.333333 chance that it would be a hermaphrodite) but, I'm kind of glad. Girls are very helpful and like helping mom out with household tasks and like to help out with younger siblings. (Although my friend Sherrie has an amazing son who loves his little sisters very much.)

That, and I have a few really AMAZING halloween costumes in mind. I did have a few really cute ideas in case I had a boy, but dressing girls up is so fun.

Now, I just have to figure out what I want to do with Victorias nursery. I don't really want to have the walls repainted, but thankfully they aren't stark white - they're a very light beige. I'm thinking beige, with touches of pink and purple... mayyyybeeee a little bit of gold in there. I want to see if I can have fun with decorating while challenging myself to be creative, frugal and be spacially aware - since it's a pretty small room, I don't really want to fill it up.

I'll probably post pictures as things develope. Right now all I have in there is her crib and my crafting table - which I've brought up from the basement to do my Christmas Craft Challenge (Making home as Christmas-y and in the spirit of the holiday season, while spending as little as possible... so far, I've spent I think $10-$12 on it. Most of that is hot glue. The rest of the supplies I found around the house :D)

Anyway, that's my little Christmas gender reveal.

How is your holiday season going? Is there anything on your want list you'd like to see filled? Or, is there a gift that you are giving to someone special that you are really excited about?

My (Other) Baby

So, last week I had about a day and a half where I was just bummed out. I couldn't pin point exactly why (Thanks hormones.) but I missed my mom and I missed my other baby. I know that since there wasn't any chance that it was ever going to form into a person since all I had was just an empty sac, but you still have an idea of how your life is going to be with that new little life. And I, like any other mother, envisioned my life with a new little baby.

Like I said, during those couple days where I was feeling down, I couldn't remember when our first baby would have been due. And I couldn't find my old day planner, but knew I had kept it. And I haven't been able to satisfy that need to know.

When was my first pregnancy due to end?
Today I found my old day planner, went online to calculate my due date - and my other baby, would have been due October 31 and would be a little bit more than a month old right now.

I'm at odds how to feel about all of this. I'm not really sad. I'm happy that I'm not mourning the loss anymore. I'm happy that I'm pregnant right now and I'm halfway to my due date now. But part of me is upset that I forgot when my little bundle was due - and that the date came and went and I didn't notice or remember. I thought I would. If I don't remember, then who will?

I am glad that it doesn't take up all my thoughts anymore. I used to think about it everyday. Multiple times a day. Now there are whole days in between where I don't think about it and life is moving on like normal. (Which is okay).

Today, I go to the hospital to get my last ultrasound. The ultrasound where I will (hopefully) find out the sex of this little one. And while I know I'm going to have a good day and I will be excited no matter what it is, I think that today will be bitter sweet.

It's a good thing I decided not to wear makeup, because I might have left the hospital later with my mascara running.